How to Use "Upset" to Create Positive Change in Your Life

“I am upset because…”

Life rarely unfolds exactly as we imagine it. We all have our own idealized version of how things should play out. But when something doesn’t go according to plan, it can create a cascade of excuses: reasons why we can’t move forward, why we’re stuck, and why it feels impossible to let go.

Excuses, however, anchor us in negative energy, creating feelings of stagnation.

What Makes You Upset?

We allow countless things to disturb our peace:

• My partner doesn’t listen to me.

• I don’t have enough money or time.

• People don’t understand me.

• My neighbor is so rude.

• I made a mistake.

• Traffic.

The ego—the conscious, surface-level part of your mind—thrives on external frustrations. It uses them to justify fear, doubt, and struggle. The ego is clever but emotionally reactive, creating endless reasons to stay stuck in a negative mindset.

The solution? You must step out of your head and into your heart.

We Can Heal Our Upset

Energy flows where your attention goes. If you focus on what upsets you, that’s where your energy will stay. This is why you feel drained, stuck, or powerless.

Living with the mindset of “I am upset because…” locks you in a victim mentality. Victims feel stuck because they place the blame for their struggles on something outside of themselves.

To break free, you must shift from blame to inspired action.

Start by exploring what needs to change. For example:

• Leave an unhealthy relationship.

• Spend time alone to discover what truly adds value to your life.

• Realign your priorities to focus on love and growth.

When you let your heart—not your ego—lead, you elevate your thoughts and vibrational energy.

We Can Learn From Our Upset

A state of perpetual peace is unrealistic—and unproductive. Being upset teaches you what is draining your energy and disrupting your peace.

The key is to stop blaming others or external circumstances and instead reflect inward. This shift allows you to reclaim your personal power.

Your feelings are always valid, but staying stuck in them prevents growth. Being upset is a teacher, revealing your triggers and unearthing the false, limiting beliefs that hold you back.

For example:

• I am unimportant.

• I’ll never be good enough.

• I’m not lovable.

Maybe you are your own trigger, holding onto guilt or shame from a past mistake. These feelings weigh heavily, but mistakes are simply lessons waiting to be learned. When you embrace the lesson, you can release the burden.

When love and appreciation drive your life, you stop limiting yourself with ideas of how things “should” be. Instead, you live authentically, letting your ego take its proper place as a supporter—not a ruler—of your life.

We Can Transform Our Upset

Blaming external factors for your upset keeps you trapped. Searching for happiness outside of yourself drains your energy and keeps you in a state of discontent.

Your mess is in your message.

When you focus on blame, all you see is the struggle—the barrier, the dead-end, the frustration. But if you shift your perspective, you can hear the lesson within the experience.

Upset often points to unmet needs, such as:

• An unfulfilled goal or intention.

• A communication breakdown.

• An unhealed wound from trauma.

• An unfulfilled expectation.

When something is "un-[whatever]," it requires action to change it—not a reaction. You have the power to act, to choose love and growth over blame and stagnation.

Reframing “I am upset because” into “I am grateful for” transforms one's perspective and aligns one with one's authentic self.

Elevate Your Thinking Mind - Create Positive Change

Being upset wastes your energy because it places you in a reactive state. But if you allow your feelings to teach you, they can guide you toward healing and change.

Ask yourself:

• Why am I upset?

• Does something in my life need to change?

• Is there something I need to heal?

Taking action on these answers is how you create a fulfilled and meaningful life.

Two Ways to Transform Your Energy

1. Meditation:

   Slow down and tune into your body. Meditation helps you center yourself, quiet your mind, and listen to your inner wisdom.

   
   

2. Gratitude:

   Gratitude changes your attitude. By focusing on what you’re thankful for, you elevate your energy, enhance your personal power, and reframe your mindset.

The Power of Gratitude

Shifting from “I am upset because…” to “I am grateful for…” can change your life exponentially. Gratitude realigns your focus, allowing you to see the blessings in every situation—even the challenging ones.

Ready to experience this shift for yourself?

Check out my free 7-Day Gratitude Challenge and start transforming your mindset to create positive change today!

What has upset taught you about yourself? Share your reflections in the comments below—I’d love to hear your story.